Thursday, May 7, 2009

I'm not Grace Kelly

I've gotten so used to hiding indoors, trying to stay dry, that I almost didn't know what to do with myself when the sun came out for about six hours yesterday. Mark went to mow the overgrown grounds of The Wilds all evening, so I took advantage of the free hours, hopped in my car and took a drive with the top down. I drive a convertible, but in Oklahoma perfect convertible weather is very rare. Too hot, too cold, too windy, too wet. Plus, the inside of the car has to be clean so you don't have trash swirling up and out of your car like an overloaded trash truck. Not that my car is trashed or anything. But who wants the receipt from your last trip to the drive-through ATM to go flying out, or that empty Sonic bag to jump out and pummel the unsuspecting driver behind you? Conditions have to be just right to put the top down.

Last night was one of those rare occasions. I wanted some flowers for the front flower beds, and the trip to buy them wouldn't involve any interstate driving -because I also don't like driving on the freeway with the top down...too windy - so down came the top. Yes, I'm picky.

Maybe I'm just not a convertible type person. I'm very private. I know! You're thinking - she writes a blog and is on Facebook and Twitter. But I decide what to put out there. The level of shareage is up to me. When I drive around with the top down in my car I feel very exposed. It's like "Hey everybody, look at me! I'm wearing sweatpants and an old t-shirt because I've been working in the yard". I feel like I should put on big sunglasses and a cut little sweater and wrap a scarf around my neck like an old Grace Kelly movie when driving in a convertible. Most of the time I feel like "Yes, I'm driving a convertible, and yes, I'm just not that cool".

If I asked my mother, she'd say that no one is looking at me. She used to tell me that in junior high when I felt awkward or was embarrassed by something. She'd point out that really, no one cared as much as I thought they did. But really? When I'm sitting at an intersection waiting for the light to change, I'm pretty sure people are looking at the person in the convertible. I would be.

I'm thinking I should embrace the inner extrovert that is trying to find its way out of the dark cave of my introverted life. If you've got it, flaunt it, right?

It looks like it's shaping up to be a rainy morning, so cave dwelling is acceptable for another day.


tessa said...

Oh people look at other people in cars. I do it ALL the time, and it's kind of awkward when they catch you doing it.

And I bet those middle schoolers were paying attention. Especially the boys :)

jen said...

you are cracking me up with all the MOther's Day stuff. I'd be looking at the peep next to me in the convertible - every time. Happy Mother's Day. I love that blue/black collection.