Wednesday, June 24, 2009

It's my party and I'll cry if I want to

Wow the last seven days have been, um, interesting...exhausting...challenging. I anticipated they would not be a walk in the park, so to speak. But I probably underestimated the need to dig deep and pull up from the depths both physical and emotional strength beyond what I thought I had in reserve. And there's the problem. One must start with some reserves in order to tap into said reserves.

My husband's parents are now moved out of their Kansas home and into our new shared home in Oklahoma. (We must sell our current home before joining them.) There is still a lifetime of accumulated stuff to go through in the garage and the kitchen is not fully unpacked. But the basics are in place. Including the mailbox, which apparently got knocked down while the new home was empty. Funny how you don't notice things until you wander out to see if the mail has been forwarded yet, but are unable to actually find the mail receptacle.

If we weren't already on a first name basis at Home Depot, we are now.

Did I mention that we also lightly passed over Father's Day and Mark's 50th birthday? By the time Sunday rolled around we were too exhausted to celebrate anything except that we could go back to work on Monday and sit down for a few hours. Indoors.

Can I be honest? Well, as honest as I can be on a blog that people actually read? I have no problem getting along with my in-laws. I have great hope for our ability to coexist peacefully. It's when other folks get all up in our business, giving out unsolicited advice, whispering discontent, that things don't go well. The four of us have to make our own way, find a new normal in this transition. It's not going to be easy for any of us, but I think it will be worth it.

Mark and I lead fast paced lives and will need to slow down and actually listen respectfully before moving ahead with plans or changes or opinions. The in-laws are from what has been called "The Greatest Generation", a group of fiercely independent folks who endured and thrived despite great hardship. They will need to learn the art of graceful dependence as their bodies and minds begin to betray them.

There are many challenges ahead, but I anticipate an improved quality of life for all of us. May God be with us in this new phase.

Oh, and happy birthday to my precious Mark. 50 is a respectable age. Your body has given you a present of a few gray hairs. I kinda like them.


Mark said...

YEA!!! Cari's back to blogging again! Any of you miss her blogs as much as me?

Let's see, great picture of MY cake. Yes, I wore 3 different ORANGE t-shirts thoughout the weekend. Your welcome Tessa! No, Cari didn't lie about not having any energy in reserve, she's exhausted! Yes, we are very much looking forward to sharing a house with my parents. We will now have the BIG cable package instead of the tiny one we had before that DIDN'T include espn. Great mailbox by the way installed by two studly mailbox installers! Keep up the good writing Sweetie! You are STILL the GREATEST!!!

Shari said...

You continue to amaze me! With the blogging and the ability to keep truckin' when the old gal has plumb run out of gas. Umm, I was thinking of an old truck, not an old you, sort of metaphorically you know.

I kept checking every day for a new blog!

Judy C said...

Cari...I love you!! ( and I thought having a grandson in the fall ( yes, we found out it's a boy) was exciting news. Nothing compared to what you folks are going through. Prayers galore being sent your way. I am a terrible communicator, and for that I am sorry....

Cindy said...

I admire you combining households with your in-laws. Every family has to make the decision that is correct for them. Your readers will be interested in hearing about your journey (as much as you are willing to share). Good luck and we will be thinking of you!

Cari said...

Thanks for the support all. I'm starting to become somewhat unexhausted.

Judy - we need to chat. I miss you.
Cindy - thanks for the note. I hope to share more about the journey. It should be interesting.