Keep it in your pants

Merry Christmas, ho ho ho.

The world seems filled with "hos" these days, all who apparently make it a regular practice to hook up with Tiger Woods. I'm a cynic. People are rarely who you think they are, so let's not get all high and mighty when one more high-profile male can't keep it in his pants. Men are stupid. Women are too. One well know man once said "for all have sinned and fall short". Some just fall short in a more spectacular and public way, like the difference between falling off the Empire State Building and falling off a curb. The splatter (collateral damage) is more painful and spectacular when falling from a very high place.

You gotta wonder though what people are thinking. Like do you wake up one morning and say "Let's crash the President's little State Dinner honey. It'll be fun". Or "hmm, how many dead people can I stuff in my house before someone notices the stench." Or "I have eight small children, so now seems like the best time to walk away from my marriage".

Do people not have enough to do? Because my life is full. I keep pretty busy. I'm too tired to do much more than the next thing. I'm happy to keep a low profile and keep my failings off the front page of the National Enquirer. Because seriously - enquiring minds will NOT be interested in my humble life. And that's just fine with me.

Rude is In

Wow have the outbursts been exploding lately, with an equal number of apologies close on their heels. What's the deal? It's not even coming from just one industry or segment of society. Congress, entertainment, sports, journalism...everyone wants a piece of the outburst action.

I can't decide if we are becoming a society of brutes or boobs or narcissists. Or perhaps we are a bunch of over-sensitive sissies. Really, there's no excuse for Kanye West's behavior. And Congressman Joe Wilson's breach of decorum was startling. It just isn't "done". At least not outside of the British Parliament. And whichever tennis-playing Williams sister it was who berated the line judge by threatening to kill her went way beyond poor sportsmanship. All in the brute/boob/narcissist category.

Sometimes the apologies seem to fall in the sissie category though. Did the ABC news reporter who tweeted that President Obama had just called Kanye West a jackass really need to issue an apology? I guess the comment was supposed to be off the record. Turns out Twitter is not off the record.

What about the shoe throwing reporter from Iraq? He was released from prison today after doing time for his shoe-throwing outburst at a press conference with former President Bush. Or how about the guy who is suing for being arrested for flipping off a police officer. Turns out giving the finger is protected by the constitution as a form of free speech. Turns out shoe throwing is not.

"Rep. Joe Wilson (R-SC), tennis legend Serena Williams and recording artist Kanye West held a press conference in Washington, DC today to kick off the first annual National Outburst Week." -Andy Borowitz, Huffington Post

"Been a busy week for President Obama. I notice that he’s having Kanye West and Taylor Swift to the White House for a “root beer summit” this weekend." -Jay Leno

"Ok, so Kanye is a serial apologizer. One could say he suffers from C.A.D. (compulsive apologizing disorder)." -Amy Spies, Writer and Producer

"Patriotism is not short, frenzied outbursts of emotion, but the tranquil and steady dedication of a lifetime. "
Adlai E. Stevenson

Now THIS is pure class. From the Phillies game last night...